Monthly Archives: October 2015

Clarification! Maybe,…

There seems to be a bit of confusion around the event coming up in a couple days. We’ve been calling it an event because, YES we did already get married up in Seattle in Nov. 2013, but that was because same sex marriage had just been legalized in the State of Washington. We had been wanting to get married for 18 years and in 2013 Oregon decided it was going to recognize same sex marriage if preformed in a state where it was legal. We wanted the benefits of being married. Our original intention was to 1. wait until same sex marriage was legal in Oregon or 2. have a ceremony whether it as legal or not on our 20 year anniversary with family and friends. 
     Our 20 year anniversary is on October, 27th 2015. It seems like I’ve said this a lot recently, but I just wanted to put it all out on the table so it would be clear as mud. LOL. Which who knows how clear this will be or not, but here’s the deal,… before same sex marriage was legalized and even now that it has been legalized, it’s a HUGE deal. So yes, we are married and yes we are having an event that can’t really be called just a reception because we are doing some of the wedding stuff. Since we’re already married we feel weird calling it a wedding, but again we are som of the wedding stuff. It feels weird to call it a renewing of our vows since we just did vows a couple years ago. So we don’t really know what to call this event and that’s why we’ve been calling it our event. 
     I’ve been married twice before I met Keri when I was confused and trying to live a straight life. I didn’t plan either of those weddings. Church people swooped in and did everything. This is my first real true love wedding type event bigger than 7 people attending including the Judge and ourselves and certainly it’s not my intention to minimize our November 2013 courtroom marriage. I can’t tell you how joyous that private little ceremony was to Keri and I (Thank you so much Shanna and Kelly) and truth be told Keri would have totally been satisfied with that one, but I wanted a stand before everyone and declare our commitment to one another ceremony and this is that event. 
     What would you call it? Renew vows reception wedding anniversary thingy. I don’t know. All I know is I’m getting a chance to share how I feel about the woman I love in front of our closest friends and our dear sweet families. I am a woman in love and I could not be happier to be having this celebration with the woman I chose so many years ago and am lucky enough to have been chosen by her as well. 
     I’m not sorry if its been confusing to anyone, because honestly it’s all been a little confusing for me for a long time. Until now. It’s crystal clear to me that I’m getting the chance to proclaim my love for my woman as my wife.  


Put Me in Coach

     I don’t know if you all know this or not, but in August of this year I signed up to be an independent coach for a company called Beach Body. I was approached by a friend of mine that I met in a Facebook group. At first it was an invitation to participate in a challenge group (June 2015), which I accepted and loved dearly. The group was full of people who had similar goals as me, to get fit and maintain a healthy lifestyle.

     Everyone in the group was supportive and enthusiastic. I jumped in, like I do in most things, feet first. 
I loved checking in daily and adding a bit of encouragement to the other people in the challenge group. It was so fun. I was asked to join again the following month (July 2015) That month was a little rougher, as I gotten a spider bite and was encouraged by Urgent care doctors to minimize my exercise until that infection went down. In August, I was asked again to join the challenge group and also asked if I might be interested in a larger group with a little more involvement. I wasn’t sure I was up for the extra posting and accountability, but I said sure sign me up and I’ll just hang back in the background and see how this works. 
     I found myself drawn in by the positivity and unconditional love and support. Here we are, what seemed to me like group of strangers strung out across the United States and even further, all banding together in a group on-line, committing to ourselves and to each other that we would step up out level of activity and be more conscientious of what we were eating. It was a blast. I loved the support. I loved the encouragement and I was all in. 
     My friend that invited me to these groups sent me a private message, acknowledging my participation and enthusiasm in the group. She said I had all the qualities and comments towards others posts to be a coach. She said I was a natural. I can not tell you how good that made me feel. I have always been an eternal optimist and a cheerleader of sorts, but for someone I’d only known for 2.5 months to see this in me enough to comment and invite me to a business opportunity was amazing. I was high on life. Oh my gosh, a dream come true. I can be a coach.
     Guess what!!! I’m a Beach Body coach!!! No, that doesn’t mean I have a beach body, it means I’m working towards health and fitness and helping others to do so as well. I love the positive culture. I love the training, support and guidance. I love the opportunity to help others. I love this feeling of confidence that Beach Body cultivates. I love the opportunity to see the challenges of life in a different light. I’m super excited about the future and fulfilling my dreams.      


Making Friends

Sometimes something irritating shows up in your life and you reach both hands up to your head and grab your hair in frustration.

I know because this JUST happened to me. Just before I pulled my own hair I decided to let it go, my hair that is. I was still in the grips of frustration over this new seemingly pointless chore that was added to my daily tasks. I was scrambling for a way out. I printed a couple reports to get out of having to do data entry in a new spread sheet. I hate spread sheets!! Have I mentioned yet that I have dyslexia???

People with dyslexia and rows and rows of numbers don’t go to the same parties. We usually get into fights.

Anyway, I sent over this detail report I discovered and hoped to high heavens that it would satisfy the accountants need. I asked them to check it out and actually begged for them to consider accepting it instead of having me fill out that dreadful spread sheet. The body of my e-mail actually contained the following, “P- P- PUH- LEEZE consider this report”. They “LOLed” back and then explained why the spread sheet would be beneficial.

Once I understood the reason behind keeping the spread sheet I completely relinquished my desire to cast it aside. Instead I decided to change my mind about the spread sheet. Now I see it as a tool that I intend to use to hone my skills and assist me in achieving excellence. My goal is to achieve and exceed the expectation.

Everyday we are faced with opportunities and everyone of those opportunities has a multitude of outcomes, it’s up to you to decide if you’ll embrace it and grow or resist it and stay stuck.

Yes, I have dyslexia and look at me making friends with rows and rows of numbers.image

Everything is about Mindset

Today is the first day of the rest of my amazing life. So starting today, right this minute I’m making up my mind to maintain the amazingness. 
I have every reason to be happy with my life and even on a day when I might have something to grouse about, I’m going to focus on other things that bring me joy. 

And so it is. 


He Passed!!!

Over this last weekend Keri, Marbles and I went downtown for his final Canine Good Citizen test. What is Canine Good Citizen many people have asked. The American Kennel club describes it as: Responsible Owners, Well Mannered Dogs. The AKC’s Canine Good Citizen program is recognized as a gold standard for dog behavior. In CGC, dogs who pass the 10 step CGC test can earn a certificate and/or the official AKC CGC title. Dogs with the CGC title have the suffix of CGC after their names. 
It has been a ton of hard work. Many hours of training in the class room, at home and at various parks. Personally, I grew a bit frustrated with the whole process, as I am certain Keri did as well. This training with Marbles and the Wonderful trainers at Wonder Puppy has challenged me and my relationship, but you know what else it has done? It has bonded the three of us together as a family.
There were times when I got so frustrated I doubted whether we should have gotten another dog. There were times when we wanted to throw our hands up in the air a say, “Forget it!!!” But, we didn’t. We hung in there. We supported each other and we took turns when we thought we couldn’t take it any more. 
We shared the test, because we have different skills that we excel at with Marbles. One skill that Marbles struggled with sometimes, especially the week before the final test was the Supervised Separation test. This test demonstrates that a dog can be left with a trusted person, if necessary, and will maintain training and good manners. The owner will go out of sight for three minutes. The dog doesn’t have to stay in position but should not continually bark, whine, or pace unnecessarily, or show anything stronger than mild agitation or nervousness. Evaluators may talk to the dog but should not engage in excessive talking, petting, or management attempts.

When Marbles became so agitated last week when he was left with supervised separation Keri went into a bit of a tail spin of worry. Concerned he may not pass, we enlisted the help of our friend and neighbor, Teresa. We took Teresa out with us a few times between the week before last Sunday and this last Sunday. Our trainer said it was acceptable for a friend or family member who didn’t live in the house to stay with the dog during this portion of the test. 
He passed!!! I say with flying colors, but he did have to repeat one skill. Who cares??? He passed and passing is all we wanted. Celebrate!!! Good times!! Oh yeah!!! No more official formal training that requires a test for a L O N G time. We’ve been in training with this guy for 9 months. It has felt longer. BUT having good mannered dog that we can confidently take with us anywhere we go is worth it. 
Thank you Teresa for stepping in for the additional support. Thank you to Katelin and all the other trainers of Wonder Puppy for working so diligently with us and putting up with our unconventional ways. We enjoyed getting to know the other dogs and people in the classes. Good job Marbles Bear CGC. Mommies love you very much.   


Where’s the Should in Joy

Ok, I have a little saying to share with you. I’m not sure where I picked this up, but somewhere along the line I discovered this little gem and it’s just stuck with me.

Here’s the set up: You get off work early or you have some free time in your day and this wonderful idea of taking a moment to chill and relax for a moment comes to you. Ahhhh,… it’s so nice to relax. Suddenly, something pops in your mind!!! I should do that (whatever it is chore/task) This is where I insert the saying,… STOP shoulding on yourself!!!

Should is used to indicate correctness, obligation or duty and typically used when being critical.

I’ve been in many situations where I’ve encouraged people to choose a slightly different view of a particular situation. “I have to work out” “I have homework to do. UGH!!” “I don’t want to feel trapped”. You have a choice.

Look at it in a different light, change your focus. Instead of looking at the chore or the obligation, focus on the result. What’s your goal? You made a decision to be fit, get educated or make a payment plan, so you could afford that whatever thing you wanted. Focus on the results and enjoy the process.

Then people ask, “Well, should I study harder?” “Should I stop eating french fries?” “Should I buckle down and make an extra payment?” There is no should. Life is about joy and everything we involve ourselves in we do so because we believe we will feel better in the having of it. Education, fitness, purchases and many other things.

There is no should in joy. There is only a personal choice. What makes you feel good? What are you willing to do? What are you willing to allow? Everyone is different. Enjoy being yourself and STOP shoulding on yourself.

Well,… that’s what I think you should do. LOL

Line up with your Awesomeness


You know those people??? They walk in the room and you notice them immediately!!! Or you see something they post on FB and you like just about everything they post. You’re thinking to yourself, “Wow!!! They really have it together. I want what they have.” 
     Guess what!!! You are that person to someone. I know you’ve heard the saying, “You may not be something to everyone, but to someone you are everything”. I know when you’re honest with yourself, you can think of someone who’s life has changed simply from knowing you. 
     You hear people all the time say things like, “If I could change one person’s life for the better, all the effort I’ve put into (blank) would be worth every minute.” Think of that one person, or many people who you’ve had a positive affect on, when you’re having a bad day and feeling blue, bring these people to the front of your mind and remind yourself that YOU have made a difference in people’s lives. YOU have helped them feel better and you can do the exact same thing for yourself.  
     Start a file for yourself. Whenever somebody thanks you for something nice you’ve done for them, write it down and put it in your file. When you receive a compliment or praise of some sort, put it in the file. Over time you’ll collect a whole bunch of positive feed back you can reflect on when you’re having one of those “not so good days”. I promise it will make you feel better. 
     You’re an amazing person and you deserve to feel the fullness of your awesomeness. Why not start today,…   




Everything happens exactly as it’s supposed to happen. Many times in life we spend time looking for that missing piece. I know, because I’ve been on a lifelong search. I’ve found many things along the way that have been fulfilling, but just not exactly the perfect fit. I keep refining my path.
In my 30’s I realized I didn’t have a vision for myself. I wasn’t on fire. I wasn’t plugged into my passion, but I had an experience that sort of shook me. An experience that created a question in my soul, “What is your vision?”
The answer I came to was this, “I want to tap into my creativity and utilize my talents and skills to positively affect the lives of people around me.” I began with art because I love to paint, mold, shape, cut, paste and create. I learned very fast that art is subjective and limiting, in my case for the affect I desired to create. The paintings and art I created was very moving to several individuals and for those experiences I’m very grateful.
However, the affect I was yearning to implement required a broader scope. After a bit of soul searching and talking it over with Keri, my idea woman, we found ourselves discussing a new idea. It was actually Keri’s idea and she said, You know what you could do? You could write a blog.”
I had never read a blog and I really didn’t know what or how I was going to begin the next adventure of my life, but with a little help from my friends, Apozitude was born. I’ve been writing this blog just over two years and it has always been my intention to infuse the world around me with a positive attitude, hence, Apozitude. The dream keeps growing and I’m working towards an Apozolyptic affect.
What is an Apozolyptic affect, you may be asking yourself. Well, think of a Apocalypse, which is defined as a complete and final destruction of the world (and I’ll just add a little classifier here in reference to the Apozolytic affect). Complete and final destruction of the world as we know it today, meaning, after the Apozolyptic affect there will only be positivity swirling around in the world. Wouldn’t that be nice?

A Quarter of a Century

Oh my goodness!!! Can you believe it??? 25 years ago TODAY I was blessed with the birth of my bouncing baby boy.

Why do people say bouncing baby? That’s kinda weird don’t you think??? Babies don’t bounce,… Anyway, I just googled it.

Bouncing is an old English phrase referencing bounding with health. Which I’m very happy to say is a true statement of my son. He’s always been healthy and wise beyond his years.

I’m impressed with Garrison’s dedication to his health, not only his physical health but his emotional and spiritual health as well. I’m
so proud of his persistence to follow his dreams and be true to himself. I have unbending faith that he will be, do and have whatever he sets his mind to be, do or have.

He knows he has the power. He is connected and he is doing his thing. It’s hard to believe it’s been 25 years. Happy birthday Garrison!

You know it, I know, but momma likes to say it so much!!! Momma loves you baby boy (full-grown man). Wow!! That’s crazy talk. I wonder when, if ever, you get used to your child being an adult??? I guess I’ll have to wait and see.

Happy Birthday Garrison!!! image