Monthly Archives: January 2017

Tired of the Heaviness of Current Events?

You may not have noticed, but in case you’ve been living under a rock, I’m here to inform you that there’s been quite a bit of heaviness in our current state of affairs with divisiveness seeming to be the prevailing mood of our greater populace. I’m, by no means, attempting to make light of our situation. I am, however, attempting to shift the focus for a moment towards a broader vision. A vision of love and in a world when there are so many different love languages, wouldn’t it awesome to share a crystal clear message of love accompanied with its own translation.

Check out this adorable Love Robot T-Shirt. You say you don’t know what “Beep beep boop beep” means, well fortunately, this message comes with a translation. It also comes in any style, color or size you’d like. Perfect for anyone you love!!

Share love with the world with your own love shirt, or buy it for that special someone in your life. Valentine’s Day is right around the corner, you could click the link above and be DONE with your Valentine’s Day shopping. This gives you more time for you, so kick back and relax. Apozitude is here to help.

© 2017 Angel Zamudio

Clarification on How to Create Space for Happiness

I wrote a blog a couple of weeks ago about how to create more space in your life for happiness. It began with a series of questions: Have you ever felt not quite yourself? Squirmed with discomfort in your own skin during a conversation or a particular situation? Had a strong emotional reaction to something someone else said or did?

I clarified that you don’t have to answer because we’ve all had these feelings and reactions. We’re all human and all come equipped with emotions and most of the time we allow ourselves to get entangled and imprisoned by these emotions and mix ups of misunderstanding. I know it’s uncomfortable, I’ve been there many times. My intention with that blog and with all my blogs really is to raise awareness. What I’ve come to know with absolute certainty is this,

The circumstances of our lives exist because we allow them to exist.

With this knowledge, as always you have choices. You could; choose to get pissed off and cast blame which will likely result in staying stuck OR you could choose to take an honest look at yourself and accept responsibility for your part and get to the business of moving on.

Not too long ago, I was in a situation that felt like I was stuck with zero power. I couldn’t change the behavior of others, I was continually stressed out and upset and I didn’t feel like I had the power to make the changes that needed to be made. I notified a person in authority of the needed changes and he chose to get pissed off and blame others. The writing was on the wall and I knew what was going to happen because this wasn’t an isolated incidence – nothing was going to change and I’d remain stuck in that stressful and upsetting situation UNLESS,… I accepted responsibility for my part. So, I made a choice and I took myself out of the situation.

It was exhilarating to finally feel free of that overwhelming stress. Even during this time of exhilarating freedom, I experienced dips in my enthusiasm that felt in close proximity to fear. I wondered if I had made the right choice, but I knew in my heart it was right because of how happy I felt. For the moments when taking that leap of faith got scary, I kept reminding myself that fear and faith don’t live in the same house. I’d look at myself in the mirror each day and asked myself, “Do you have faith that you made the right decision?” and I’d say, “Yes” and then I’d say, “Ok, then everything is going to be ok, because faith will lead you to your happiness. Faith and fear don’t live in the same house. ANY time fear knocks on your door and even if it gets through the door, kindly remind your unwanted guest, ‘You’re not welcome here because this is a house where faith lives!’ ” It made me feel so much better. Yeah, I know it sounds a little bit crazy, having out loud conversations with myself, but it really helped me remain calm and certain of myself. Certainty of self is definitely a feeling worthy of such a risk.

When you feel frustrated with a situation, it means you’re focused on the problem and you feel powerless and because you’re so focused on the problem, you can’t even see a solution. It’s like listening to a radio station that plays music you don’t like and just complaining about it. What I’m telling you is, you can take action and make a change.

There are multiple levels of making change, it doesn’t have to be ending the relationship or leaving the whole situation like in my case above, but I assure you the way to gain power in your life is to take a deep breath and then take a few more deep breaths. Take as many deep breaths as you need to feel your emotions subside, so you can step back from the feelings of the problem and evaluate the problem from a fact based position.

A couple of weeks ago when wrapped up to make my closing point, my advice was to focus on a solution and even if the solution you come to places you in a position of approaching someone who you felt had caused you discomfort, if you approached them with the intention of understanding their perspective and intention, with a clear mind and an open heart, you may very well be surprised to find the whole thing was a big misunderstanding. I clarified that I thought it was always a misunderstanding. Then I asked, Are you poised enough to guide the situation towards a solution? I believe with desire, determination and practice, you’ll gain the poise needed to guide any willing participants towards a viable solution.

The point I want to clarify now is one very important word, willing, because believe me when I say, if you’re working with someone who has no desire to take a look at themselves and make needed changes, you might as well hang up your hat and call it quits, because HOLY CAT!!! the unwilling, in my experience, are a stubborn and miserable bunch of folks. Personally, I run with the willing. Only you can decide what’s best for you.

© 2017 Angel Zamudio

Who You Are

Get your open heart t-shirt here

My heart is open and my eyes can see. Infinite love flows to me and through me. When I look at you, I see you with eyes of infinite love. I see you as your authentic self. I see beyond labels, flawed premises and defense mechanisms and I have an infinite love for you.

Strip us to our core of ALL labels and you’ll find that we’re far more alike than we are different.

Some would call our collective beings: humanity, but further stripped of labels than that, we are eternal spiritual beings. This aspect of ourselves is where I choose to focus, where the inherent good in everyone resides. I make this choice because it makes ME feel better to do so and if I can get one person to catch a glimpse of the value in this choice, I’ll take it because that my friend is expansion.

© 2017 Angel Zamudio

Now, THAT Felt GOOD!!!!

It’s so easy to have a positive affect on others and it feels so good too.

The other day as I was helping a young woman check in for her procedure at work, I noticed a happy little skip in her step as she turned to take a seat. I liked it and it made me smile. As she was sitting and I was standing to place her paperwork in the appropriate place, I mimicked her happy little skip. When I turned to return to my desk, we shared a quiet little chuckle as we acknowledged our shared happiness in the moment.

Is it professional for a front desk person in a surgery office to skip around the office? Generally speaking, I’d have to say no, but in that moment one little skip shared between two people will leave a better feeling impression on that young woman than had I maintained a professional demeanor. I’d rather allow myself to be a little bit vulnerable, step outside of what’s “expected” and take a chance on expanding good feelings because in the end I want to be remembered for how I made you feel, not what I did for you.

My personal goal is to leave a little bit of kindness everywhere I go, because happiness is what I choose to leave as my legacy. Joy is the indelible mark I will leave on this world.

© 2017 Angel Zamudio

Want to BE HAPPY NOW?

What’s the NUMBER 1 most sought out achievement? Think about it for a moment,….

Do more people want to be rich and famous or do you think more people want to be doctors and lawyers? I offer these examples simply to acknowledge opposite ends of a spectrum, because there’s “outside the box” careers and then there’s the more traditional ones. I’m not a professional analyst or research person by any means, so this information is merely conjecture. However, what I do know is this, regardless of the most sought out career, the NUMBER 1 most sought achievement is happiness.

No matter where you choose to go, what you choose to do or how to go about it, the bottom line is, you’re making that choice because you believe you’ll feel better when you achieve it. Right? We’ve all said something along the lines of, “If I could just,… then I’ll be happy” or “Oh! I can’t wait until,… then I’ll be happy” . My question then is this, if you can’t wait, then why delay happiness until X is achieved? Be happy NOW. Life is too short to waste one more minute on feeling dissatisfied.

The NUMBER 1 most sought out achievement is right in the palm of your hand and actually it’s even closer, it’s RIGHT there in the thoughts of your mind. When you’re going over something in your mind that bothers you such as, why did this happen? why did that happen? why did he or she say THAT to me? What will happen when,…? Why aren’t they this or that?

STOP! OK? Just stop. Take a breath. Stop and think about how all that speculation makes you feel.

Speculation breeds uncertainty. Uncertainty creates fear and even the smallest amount of fear or doubt is the kryptonite to happiness. So, whether you believe it or not, the fact remains that happiness IS a choice. What are you going to do with YOUR choice? I say, now that you KNOW you can, every chance you get, reach out a grab it!!!

Wait!!! But HOW????

Excellent question my friend!!! Pay attention to yourself. Feel the infinite intelligence of your body and emotions guiding you. When you feel fear or distress caused by the thoughts you’re thinking, your body will give you signs, tighten up and prepare you for that flight or fight mode.

The truth is, there’s no real danger here, you’re simply reliving a stressful situation or speculating a potentially stressful future situation, so instead of perpetuating this feeling, shift your focus to something else. Think about a sitting by babbling brook on a sunny afternoon or whatever helps you feel better. Don’t fall victim to the aimless thoughts of your mind. Stand up for yourself, yes, even with yourself. Be the powerful victor you came here to be. Take control by talking  yourself into a better feeling place.

Remember to be gentle with yourself as you begin the practice of shifting your focus towards the good feeling certainties of your life. I promise with continual letting go of the negative or potential negative and shifting your focus to the positive, you will attain that NUMBER 1 sought out achievement and a beautiful smile will stretch out across your face.

Congratulations! You’re on your way.

© 2017 Angel Zamudio

How to Navigate Through Disagreements

Have you ever been in one of those conversations that seems to be going well and then all of a sudden someone shares something that feels like a punch right in the gut? I know you have, we all have.

What do you do in that situation? It really depends on your comfort level, but here’s what I recommend whenever possible.

Stand up and leave. Plain and simple. Just leave the conversation.

It may seem more complicated than it sounds, but I assure you, I’ve put this technique to the test and it works. Everyone has a right to their own opinion and no two people are going to agree on every single subject, therefore when it is abundantly clear that someone has a completely different opinion than you AND you aren’t  going to change your mind. Simply leave the conversation.

A diplomatic way to do this is to simply state, “Well, it looks like we’ve come to an impasse, so I believe it’s best for us at this point to agree to disagree on this subject and move on. What do you say?” If the person is unable to let it go, that’s when you can easily claim, “Ok, well I’m out” and walk away.

There’s no need for anyone to be offended. You have your opinion and I have mine. I can still love you as a person. I mean do you quit a relationship over the fact that I like pink and you like green? No. Am I offended that you have a different opinion? No, because your opinion has nothing to do with me and everything to do with you.img_434744ef1cf2-1

© 2017 Angel Zamudio

Snowy Reflections

I love realizations and clarifying moments. I’m not a huge fan of winter weather, especially when snow falls in the city and causes such a stir of emotion and uncertainty in the people around me. I choose to believe that everything will be ok and that everything happens for a reason.

I feel BEST when I remain calm and rest on my beliefs that everything is always working out for me. A couple of weeks ago we had some snow in the Portland metro area causing closures of schools and businesses. My office closed early and I was able to arrive home safely with the help of a chipper co-worker of mine and one of my bosses. They happily and rather quickly helped me put the chains on my tires and that simple gesture of kindness allowed me to drive home with confidence. Thank you my friends.

fun-in-the-snowOnce I arrived home my wife and our puppy where ready to get out in that snow and romp around (mostly,…well completely the puppy’s idea). We went to the park and Marbles got his time to run around the park, romp through the snow and be his adorable fun-loving self. On our walk home, Marbles was in the lead of course and Keri was holding the leash, leaving me last in line. Our walks often happen this way for a couple of reasons, 1. Keri is usually holding the leash and is on the task of getting exercise for the puppy and 2. I’m usually lagging behind gazing up at the sky and the clouds or checking out flowers, leaves, trees, or kids playing soccer or skateboarding. I usually have to jog a bit to catch up throughout our walks.footprints-in-the-snow

On this snowy day I was focused on all the foot prints in the snow on the sidewalk and even though we were the only ones there at that moment, it felt as if the sidewalk was busy with people as I was walking and watched their footprints go by. It gave me a good feeling inside to think about all the people I wouldn’t necessarily think of otherwise because there’s no way to note that they had been there, but with their footprints left in the snow, I felt a warmth and a sense of connection knowing we’re never really alone. We’re all on this path of life and I like to think that if any one of those people appeared where their footprints were left behind that we’d walk together and enjoy each others company.

© 2017 Angel Zamudio

Are You Living an Authentic Life?

I don’t know if you’ve heard or know of this song, but it’s called, This Little Light of Mine,… I sang it as a kid and it’s super easy to recall once you’ve learned it, but knowing the words and maybe even the hand gestures is one thing, living the meaning of this song is a totally different thing all together.

If you don’t know the words, they’re super simple to learn. I’ll provide a YouTube video here just in case you haven’t heard it. The significant point of this song that often seems to go over looked is that WE ALL have this little light within us. It’s up to us to decide if we’re going to let it shine or not.

It’s easy to hide behind walls that we put in place seemingly to protect ourselves from harm. We all do it, so don’t feel bad. We put protective walls up for fear of being hurt, rejected or ostracized, but what we don’t realize is that these walls we erect to protect ourselves really keep us isolated from sharing our authentic selves.

The true happiness of life is to share our whole selves, our 100% authenticity. I understand it can feel scary, because when you share your whole true self, your whole true self can be rejected. The really amazing thing though is when you dare to be authentic, you quickly realize people really dig authenticity.

I strive to live my life unapologetically 100% authentic to myself. Do I stumble? Do I miss a beat? You bet I do!!! I’m only human and I mess things up, but people are people and the imperfect seem to be reasonably understanding of imperfection in others. You may not know this about me if you only know me through this blog or social media, but sometimes I stutter. As I was wishing someone Happy Holiday over the last week or so I stumbled pretty hard on the double “H” of Happy Holidays. I can’t really describe how it actually came out, but I followed it up with, “Well, you know what I mean” and laughed it off. One of my co-workers gasped with dismay and perhaps a bit of embarrassment as she jokingly asked, “What’s wrong with you? Are you broken?” I had to laugh because it was a funny question, but I say up straight and proud as I responded, “Nope, I’m perfect just the way that I am”.

img_3b944c1279ae-1This light of mine, I’m gonna let it SHINE. I love connecting with people. I love creating warmth and a sense of belonging. We’re all in this together and we all have a light within us just waiting for us to step up and be brave enough to let others see our sparkle. Let down your walls. Let people in. Share your sparkle and shine with the world. It feels amazing.

© 2017 Angel Zamudio